Memories of u & me...

Our stories started about 10 months ago, it's November last year when i m having my industrial training back in my home town. We were just net fren at the beginning, then we started to talk in phone and our relationship naturally become closer when day passed. You ve been my companion since then...in my boring working days, my down n upset days, my traveling days, Christmas day, new year and my 21st bday. Though u r not really by my side that time, ur messages n ur cute sound ll always arrive in time. This is the starting of our fate...we r bound each other cause ur sis is my primary sch teacher...n we talked and shared about everything in our life. Our relationship improve when i found u helpless n ve no1 to rely on...i pull u up n always be ur companion in those hardy day...we both treasure each other a lots during those times.
You promised me to celebrate my 21st Birthday with me but at last u din turned up and i rejected every1 cause i really hop to celebrate with u n i dont wan to break our promise. Due to some reason u cant make it but u called me to apologize n i was so touch that i cried in the phone and i can felt that tis made u worry. We at last met each other on 21st of Jan when u came back from holiday, we had lunch together at Cafex2 and i still remember that day is a rainy day..everything went smoothly that day n i was really happy to c u . After that, we started to date...we go out often...drive around in town, chit chating, movie's, serikei and eating.
U held up my hand the 1st time on 2nd of Feb when we r watching death note 2, though i know u don really understand the movie cuz u din watched part 1...u acc me till the movie end...n is almost 2am tat night when u reach home...ended up u were badly scolded by ur mum...feel so guilty bout that...!
This is how our relationship changed from close friends to couple. Being with u from the beginning had never been easy to both of us...we faced a lots of cumber. However, recalled back now it is quite sweet too...i still remembered the fireworks u promise me on my birthday u actually did it on 1 month after my actual date to replace my lost that day...n we played fireworks beside the airport on our 1st month anniversary while watching the plane took off is the last flight of airasia to kl. u bought me a ring on valentine day n we wore the couple shirt i gave u then we ve lunch together. we were lovely couple those days...though we do ve some argument sometimes. Cause of u...i gave up my dream to uk n came here...the main reason is i just wanna be with u...n i really don wish to lose u...however, it still din work..
this kind of happy days doesnt last long, even myself also don know when tis relationship started to change...we quarreled a lots cuz of the same problems times n times. After i finish my diploma n went back home 4 holiday, u totally change...not even a msg/ call everyday...i wait n wait n wait...n the reason u gave me is u r busy...!! i lost my patient and i asked 4 break up the 1st time...i was really sad...cause tat time i m well prepared to Adelaide ald...but u treat me like tis...i m really angry n disappointed on u. After that i do regret, so i flied back on ur birthday n wish to celebrate the special day with u cause i remembered u said that ald 2 years u celebrate alone...but end up with nothing to. I just sent the present to ur house...n we din meet up. I had a bad holiday...everything was screwed...i cant manage to get u back but i realize something else that hurt me deeply...n i m ready to gave up. I was backed to home town n was ready to fly all by myself to the new environment n started a new life but u bump into my life again when u suddenly appear in my hometown...so we tried to work it out again.
Things went well after that...i came here 1st n i was counting down the days u were here. At last u were here, we lived under one roof, worked in the same place, went to the same church, did weekly shopping together, watched movie together, ate together,etc...After the incident on 21st of August i was totally shocked of wat u did to me...i had lost all my trust on u...n i m so so disappointed. U do explained to me...but it doesnt work on me anymore i guess.
I m facing tis guy everyday...i tried so hard to convince myself to give up...n i really wan to...y it is so hard?My mind is telling me i should do that n i clearly know what i wan...but my heart is not listening to my mind...i really dun know wat can i do??I m strong in appearance but God knows i m not physically...i shaded a lots of tear cause of tis guy...but he said he cant feel that i love him...maybe i m just not an expert in expressing how i feel. I never be like this b4...i don like the me now...i ve to pretend i m happy when facing him cause i don wan him to know that i ll still sad cause of him...i just want to end everything up...clear n clean. Where is my happyjia spirit goes??i m going to find it back someday...all i need is times...move on move on!!Memories of u n me ll always be in my mind...cause u r the 2nd guy i really fall in love wif...though tis relationship at the end still dont work out...i m glad to know u n i mean it!Thanks 4 everything...all the happiness and dreams u ever gave me...thanks n hugs...it really do mean something to me...!!n i m going to miss it n put inside my heart forever....

This song represent all the feeling i m experiencing now...n i really love tis song....

该忘了你对不对 -- 周惠

大雨过后的眼泪
挂在充满回忆的橱窗
我却不想忘以往
那些心碎的心创

记忆是一个行囊
陪伴着我到世界流浪
我让悲伤都装上翅膀
再见了就不能倔强

该忘了你对不对
怕自己无法面对
无怨无悔
把一切留给纪念
受过沉默的创伤
它会慢慢被岁月
一片片填满
渐渐就习惯不再想
忘记曾经最痛的地方

该忘了你对不对
我应该坚强面对
学会遗忘
不能像爱的挣扎
记忆会为我收藏
那些美丽时光
为爱付出过的力量
带着爱去寻找
幸福的希望